Why elbows off the table

And is it actually rude? Like most etiquette rules, mealtime elbow placement is a holdover from a bygone era. For earlier civilizations, it was a way to prevent outbreaks of violence at the table. Think of it this way. Situated on either side of a place setting, the fork and knife already act as an imaginary boundary for each person's space at the table. Save Pin More. By Jenn Sinrich. Comments Add Comment. Back to story Comment on this project. Tell us what you think Everybody and their mother wants to go to it, and boast about how they dined with such and such.

Most of these feasts would have been served on long tables with benches instead of seats. People would pack in like sardines and there simply was no room to have your elbows on the table without jostling your neighbor and disrupting his ability to eat.

As well, such accidents could cause quarrels, or even violence to break out. Even today, if you go out to dinner with more than a couple of people, having your elbows on the table could cause a fork mishap, knock over glasses, pull the tablecloth which would also knock over things , and get in the way of the server placing dishes on the table. This formal etiquette rule became so entrenched that a childhood rhyme was attached to it, perfect for jump-rope chants:.

What do we do about it? Well, instead of worrying about the rule, just think of the personal space of those around you and the formality of the situation. With friends and family, simply consider the personal space of those around you as well. If there is plenty of room you can probably make yourself a bit more comfortable.

But once the dinner is clear and you are having a conversation, maybe with only drinks being consumed, your friends are probably not going to mind if you lean forward with your elbows on the table, etc. People could become scared when others exhibited bad table manners in the fear that a brawl was going to erupt. The general rule was to ensure that your arms remained within the confines of your tableware, which acted as a border. If you ignored the border created by your cutlery, it suggested you had a general lack of restraint.

While the fear of a fight breaking out is no longer a common one at the dinner table, the no elbows rule remains part of good etiquette.